I’m Flying

So I have compiled the parts of the song for my dad!

To give a little bit of background on the inspiration and motivation behind this piece… it’s been a little bit of a crazy year for our family. Lots of unexpected experiences and changes of plans have come our way.

Not long after parts of this song began forming in my mind, my dad experienced a heart attack. Though not a major one, it was a scare to everyone. And even though we didn’t have the means to do much for Christmas this time around, and my plans for a job after the holidays had fallen through at the last minute, and none of us had any idea what was going to happen in our lives during the next few months immediately following that, we had a great time being together during the holidays because we could appreciate that we were, in fact, together. It was nice!

Of course, my dad is a very sentimental kind of person, so a lot of little things matter to him that probably a lot of people take for granted. My music is one of those things. It’s not like my dad and I hang out and talk all the time or anything–he’s not really into the things I’m into (mostly because I’m a girl, and I’m 21…just a few decades behind). But it’s not really all about words anyway. It’s the presence that counts. It’s just nice to be around each other. So sometimes when I’m at home, he watches tv while I stare blankly at it and think about completely unrelated things in my own little world…because I’d rather sit there and think with someone than just sit there and think alone.

I used to play piano in the living room every day in the morning, afternoon, and night…basically all the time. I was addicted to playing the piano. I was also addicted to riding my bike, which my friends made fun of me for… but they could just kiss it because I had killer thighs and they didn’t.

Usually in the afternoons and at night when I played piano, everyone else was busy doing other stuff. My dad usually was sitting in his recliner reading his Bible or some other book in the stack beside his chair. (Guess who instilled in me the value of education.)

So I’d play piano while everybody else did whatever they did, and I didn’t think anything of it until I visited home after going off to college. I was informed by each member of the family that it was “really quiet” without me. (I guess this was a compliment…?)

That’s when I discovered that my dad really misses me playing piano. I came home one weekend, and once I found myself at the keys, I KNOW I heard someone sniffling. And I KNOW that it was my dad. This is why I usually give him things like socks for Christmas.

So Deddy, if you are reading this, I’m sending this song to you online so that when you hear it I won’t have to listen to you get all sniffly. I am not going to China (any time soon, at least); and if I do one day, it’ll be okay because I’ll be coming right back. Thank you for all your willingness to try understanding all my youthful and sometimes unexpected dreams and goals, and for always encouraging me. Also, I love you and hope you enjoy the song! (It doesn’t have any words, of course.)



I “Do”

After much thought and deliberation over my weird self and the things I need in life, this is the conclusion I’ve have come to:

When it comes to guys, I really just need someone who will treat me the way…

I treat my hair.


I mean, really…there has to be someone out there who will feel the same way about me as I feel about my hair. So…


Things I love about my hair that maybe someone will love about me:


1.       Every day is a new experience!

I never know if it’s going to cooperate with me or not, but I understand that it always has a way of its own, so I just let it do what it does! And because most of the time it does pretty okay, I can handle the bad days all right, too.


2.      It’s pretty great to have.

I’d be really gross without it…. ew.

So yeah! I really appreciate my hair!


3.      It’s always up for an adventure.

My hair is awesome for those Pinterest hair ideas where it looks like they took hours to create a formal “do.” It pretty much takes me like, five minutes.


7 bobby pins + 5 minutes = This

7 bobby pins + 5 minutes = this


4.       It sometimes makes other girls jealous.

Not that I advocate jealousy in any fashion, but the curls are a punch of power. They are literally and figuratively my crown.


5.       It has ombre layers.

It’s like it’s multidimensional… kind of like my personality!


6.       It’s soft and tough at the same time.

My hair goes through a lot every day and sometimes ends up in a majorly tangled mess. However, at the end of the day, after a nice hot shower and a tiny bit of pampering, it’s softer than any of my pillows. And it smells nice, too!


7.       It can grow.

Oh wait…

Haha! Okay, well in figurative terms, there’s always room for improvement. It’s never perfect and never will be, but it’s quite lovable anyway.


8.       It is committed to me.

It is stuck to me for life. And likewise, I wouldn’t trade my hair for anyone else’s.


9.       It’s fun and addicting to play with.

It’s like another pet. Sometimes when I’m lost in thought, or just bored, I’ll find myself twirling it, making mustaches with it, flipping it over my face. It’s also fun to tease.


10.   It’s worth the fight.

Everyone’s hair does not do compromises. But mine does!

And besides that, it’s simply the best… and I own it. :)


Haters gonna hate

Haters gonna hate.

Skinner Jeans

Sometimes I get on Pinterest and see things that look so incredible. And they usually do one of two things:

1. Make me want them.

2. Make me think I can make a better one myself. Inspire me.

So, naturally, I click on the things out of curiosity.

Occasionally, the results are satisfying, and this is what keeps you coming back for more. It’s like the Skinner Box. http://psychology.about.com/od/sindex/g/def_skinnerbox.htm

However, most of the time I just follow the pictures to someone’s DIY blog that is probably really cool, but I don’t really have the time or patience to read through all of it just to find out the answer to one tiny question I had about one little image in it.

Other times, I wind up reaching some sort of internet dead end where the original post “is no longer available,” or, “Oops!” it “doesn’t exist!” ……….

So then WHERE did it COME FROM??

Okay, so maybe it’s just me, but I was thinking most people in first world countries prefer quick and easy methods of basically everything. So, it’s probably safe to say that Pinterest, a hot tool in current popular culture, should embrace this. And it usually does! Then one day, lo and behold, I click on something that says “So easy!” or “Ten-minute fix!” only to find instructions like this:

crazy awesome pants 1



This is what all that translates to inside my brain:


crazy awesome pants 2

End result: A completely useless pair of the ugliest pants I have ever owned in my life.


And then I go back to Pinterest… for the slightest chance that there’s something on there that could actually exist and be accomplished in real life. So it’s unfortunate, but I am slowly succumbing to the life of a Pinterest rat—unable to escape the addiction to the joy of happening upon something real, possible, and screaming “You can do it!” at me from a tiny picture in a box. Clearly, I’m being conditioned. But as long as Pinterest stays mostly girly, happy, and non-violent, I think I’m okay with that.


Yay Pinterest

Yay Pinterest!


Birdiefly Kisses

When I was a freshman in college, I invested in a little friend I named Cadence. Cadence is a small, bright blue, lavender-tinted, rare breed budgerigar (parakeet) I got from Petco. Cadence was still technically a wild bird upon purchase, but I trained my little sweetie over the course of several months to become my friend.



Maybe in another post I will explain that whole process, but since I trained and socialized Cadence, that little bird has brought so many fun memories into my life that I wouldn’t trade those experiences for anything. I am now convinced that birds are truly the best pets you could ever have. So here is my list of 20 reasons why birds are awesome… in case you didn’t already know.

20 reasons why birds are pretty much the bomb diggity:

  1. They have very distinct, individual personalities.
  2. They are as loyal as dogs.
  3. They are as curious as cats.
  4. They want to be just like you.
  5. They will be just like you.
  6. They do not have foul odors like most other pets do.
  7. They are as fun to play with as children, but without all the mess.
  8. They will sing to you.
  9. They will pick up on the things you say to them and repeat them back to you exactly the way you say them.
  10. They are great company on long drives home from college.
  11. They will sometimes squawk at you until you turn on some music… Hey, they need a good jam, too.
  12. They do have a jam. You will know what song(s) to play when you want to party with your bird…whether it’s Drowning Pool’s “Bodies” or DJ Khaled’s “All I Do Is Win.”

13. They are SMART. If you are stupid, don’t get a bird.
14. They will actually eat your homework. They love to chew paper. Mine tends to think the letters on the pages are seeds and will take the literature right out of my literature paper.
15. They are beautiful… and they know it. They do not like for one feather to be messed up. Ever.
16. They adjust the volume of their noises according to the amount of light in the room, so they are quiet at night, sweetly cheerful at sunrise, and a blast of high energy and fun during the day.
17. They LOVE to play in/with/around water.
18. They love social games, like winking with you or playing child games like peek-a-boo.
19. They are always interactive. If you are the caregiver, then you are their flock.

20. They LOVE you and will crawl all over you and do really sweet but super weird things, like nibbling on your eyelashes, just to show you how much they love you.

When I come home at the end of the day, this is what I do.


So for a few months, I’ve been working on a piano composition that I eventually, when I’m finally finished with it, would like to dedicate to my dad. Some people seem to have this almost divine power to just make up anything musical right off the tops of their heads, and it’s like Mozart and Beethoven are ripped right out of the history books and cast into the land of the forever forgotten. Some people…..are not me.

Composing music on the flute is one story. It takes me a really long time, however, to complete a piano composition. This is how it works for me:

1. I don’t think about trying to create music at all. I just live my silly little life until gradually…

2. …a tune is conceived! Where it comes from? I can’t ever be sure, but I will go out on a limb and guess that it is a product of my psychological state encompassing an extended period of time (mood and various elements of my subconscious)– yeah, totally creeped out now.

3. I harbor this tune in my mind until I get the opportunity to “pick it out” on the piano. Transferring a tune from my brain to my fingers on the piano is especially frustrating, so I’m usually okay with procrastinating this part of the whole process until I have the mental stamina/time to dedicate to it.

4. Then I realize it’s not enough. I’ve only created one little section of music that needs something before it, something after it, or (usually) both!

5. I keep messing around with sounds on the piano until I get tired of it and move on to play a song I already know or do some other lazier activity.

6. Steps 1-5 are repeated for a few hours, days, weeks, months, or sometimes years until I feel that I have completed the piece to my best ability.

The advantage: Having closure.

The disadvantage: It’s NEVER as good as the music my mind actually creates.

So tonight I was working on the song for my dad. It’s called “I’m Flying”– sounds cheesy, but it just popped into my mind when I first started working on it, and I haven’t been able to shake it, so that is its name.

Well, as I was sewing my sections of music together into a whole song, I realized that I identify each section with a thought–a concept, a mental image, a memory, another song, or even something as simple as a color. I was having a hard time deciding the arrangements of the sections, so I got out a piece of paper and started naming them. And whoa… was it weird.

The names.

The names.

I’m not even going to try to explain where all of these came from, but the list at the top is what came to my mind first, and the list below that is my organization of them into how I want the song to progress.

Hearing the actual song might be a disappointment after reading these spontaneous names, but I will try to remember to post the song once it’s finished and polished up. In the meantime, here is another one of my songs.

I wrote this one when I was 16.

Just double checking

So today I went to deposit a check at the bank. I’m not sure why this amused me, but as I signed the back of the check, I noticed that the space was a good inch or two of room to write a signature, and on this check, there were no lines to sign on. Do people really need this much space for a signature?

Well, I’m a believer in people. If something can be imagined, it has probably happened. There has got to be some freak out there who has done this…

jane doe check

because they CAN!

I just wasn’t feeling that bold today.